Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

A boy and a girl are each granted a wish Girl: I want us to be lovers until the end of the world Boy: I want the world to end

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

Sarah Jessica Parker

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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