Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

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What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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