Tony Romo

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops