How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

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2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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what does a human and a bucket of red paint have in common? . . Both are not tigers

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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roses are red violets are red the whole world is red i started the holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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