#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

thumb_up thumb_down -14

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A penis walks into a bar..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

batman farted so hes retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -14

im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops