Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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i dont fisish anythi

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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