Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

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Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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What's better than doing the Hannah Montana's hoedown-throwdown? Throwin' that ho down.

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Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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White men's rights

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

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a little kid goes as candle for halloween, 69 girls blew him teenage boy goes as candle for halloween, all he got was burned

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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