an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Does it really matter?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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