What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

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What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Obama lin Baden.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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