Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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YEAH! LIKE RELLEZ! XD Anyway, sure, it depends, you don't get voted as the most pointless man on Horse-head network without working some for it, but if really weird comments impress you, then sure. Honestly though, I might have been flexing my show off muscles a bit more than usual, as in posting more stupid stuff than usual, BUT, that is because when a MAN meets a sexy WOMAN, yet another one than his WIFE, his already boiling testosterone burns with flames... ...And yeah, where where we again? Oh yeah, you acting a bit bimbo, and me going "RELLEZ" just to make you aware... Then added this.

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

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i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

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Why did the deer cross the road? It didn't, the animal species is incapable of having a logical reason to possessing the will to cross a road. ruhtard

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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