Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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A horse walks into a bar, and is then put down because of the injuries it sustained from the impact.

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Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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