What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down -11

One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock. Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the beer from the other man and throws it on the floor, breaking it. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the award-winning physicist say to the community college graduate? I'll have Chicken McNuggets please.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between tires and a black guy? Tires don't scream once there are chains around them. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a kid that hasnt passes 7th grade? A 6th grader

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops