What is white, sticky, and something that gay people and women love? Frosting.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue These are your Results You have Cancer

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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