What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops