Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Ol-ive

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What do you call a black guy with a white guy name? Bradley

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

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A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

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Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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