What did the black man get his mom for Mother's Day? Some jewelry and a very nice card.

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Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

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what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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If you search "fat black man" on Google, you will find many reesults about black people who happen to be chronicly obese.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops