hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops