Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from the farmer's field. The family were not too disheartened, as the rest were still contained.

In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

who is really lanky? james cornish

Mom, how do you make babies? When a daddy and mommy love each other very much... They play with trains and tunnels!(Yay!)

Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

What's the difference between a watermelon and a dead black person? There aren't 50 watermelons buried in my backyard.

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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