What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

What did John name his dog? Doggy

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

school homewrok

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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