What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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America needs to burn Less fossil fuels to save the environment

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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where did little Suzie go after the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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