What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

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Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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