A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya" the man replies: "whisky."

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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deez nuts

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

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guess what>? your mum lol

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

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Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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