What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you and then wash my hands directly after because boogers are gross

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Did you hear about the blond that jumped off a bridge? She died.

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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What do a blonde and a good beer have in common? They both go down easy.

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Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

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wanna hear a joke? me niether.

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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Jovan

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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