why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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How do you make a penguin fly? You strap it to the roof of a plane.

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

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What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

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su algato es en fuego

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why couldn't the kid get into see the pairate movie? It was rated PG-13 and he was only 11. Plus he had no money and his mother didnt want him watching movies like that.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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Why did the Chef go to jail? He killed his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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