Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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David Cameron

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

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What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

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When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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