Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Albert <3 Hunter

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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