What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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