I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? It is unlikely that this situation would occur, as tractors are very large objects and losing one would be very hard, furthermore, tractors are vital agricultural vehicles and most farmers would take care in not misplacing one.

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Proof that the Chicken came first than the Egg is all in the good book. It's called, The Dictionary!

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Why is Brodie Invited to Orlando? To make the beds

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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PICKLES

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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France had one revolution

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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