What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

make me a sandwich! what kind?

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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