What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

thumb_up thumb_down +28

rabbits running in my bathroom!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what's up? my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

make me a sandwich! what kind?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Jim bean takes out a can of- Let me guess- No.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops