Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did road cross the chicken Niggers love chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

thumb_up thumb_down -13

if there is a circle of fat people and you throw a cookie in the middle of the circle. It will be the best game of hungry hungry hippos you will ever see.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? its a refridgerator Why did the third monkey jump out of the tree It thought it was a game

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops