A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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Dead girls can't say no.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

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Why did the man go to Cantabria, Spain? Because he liked potatoes... jk

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

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Obama = ebola

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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