What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

A dyslexic man into bar walks a.

What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

dont you love porch monkeys? no.

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

Whats the leading cause of death Life.

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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