Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

What? Huh?

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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