I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

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What do you get when you eat a bag of potatoes? The're all gone.

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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womens rights

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

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The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

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Why was the baker rich? Because he had a lot of money

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Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Q. Why did Justin Beiber fall off the ladder? A. He was trying to reach puberty

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If life hands you lemons, take them they taste good

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops