What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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