Did you hear about the guys who were going to France? Well they are not going anymore.

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

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what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

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What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

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Justin's life

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

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What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

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A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops