What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

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Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Daniel G. Likes to perve on the boys in the locker room. Change quick guys!

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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roses are red violets are blue last time i dropped something this hard it ended world war 2?

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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A blind man walks into a library.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? Because he was mentally handicaped

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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