Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Albino African Americans

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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VITAMIN C!

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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