why did the chicken cross the road? He saw his family getting murdered and tried to stop it but got hit in the process

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What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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Q. Whats worse than 9 babies in 1 suitcase? A. 1 baby in 9 suitcases.

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Sixty... eight

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What did one jew say to the other jew? Want some pizza?

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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Why did Obama cross the road? Oh, wait, he didn't make it.

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops