What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

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How do you tell the difference between a politician and a reindeer? A politician is an employee who works under a strict firm of a government department while a reindeer is a large, grazing ungulate in the family Cervidae that is native to subarctic polar regions of North America.

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

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Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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