What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's worse than AIDS Nothing can possibly be worse than finding out you have AIDS

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Penis

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One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

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Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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