What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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How do you make a penguin fly? You strap it to the roof of a plane.

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what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

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your so homosexual you go to a gay bar every couple of weeks so you get the social acceptance you need.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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How are black people and apples the same They both hang from trees

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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Guest what in the butt

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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