Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

thumb_up thumb_down -19

a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's half of 8? o

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

thumb_up thumb_down -19

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Lol you respond here goood one AAANDEEERS TEN MG PER PILL Asswhipe! Besides friends call me Black Metal, you can call me Nero the avenger. Line kinda broke up with you first, you think she would send you a picture with my finger on her... cough... AND THINK YOU WOULD STILL STIck aROUND WITH HER? Id be more... well glad for your mothers sake, btw, she got me flowers, I wont tell the rest, but she got me another pic... Okay ill tell the rest then, first pic is my fingas, the other is my limpo in her mouth... The third is the funny doctor which caught us and wanted all three of us to be on the pic... Aww, no really man, you had a gem, we where good friends before me and Line, but she did not want to leave before she got me flowers... Aww... Ooooh... Oh! Well not yet but you get the picutre. I got ur message, sure im high as a kite, but I know what im doing if you can "picture" what I mean... Dont tell your mom btw, I want to surprise her, (reverse psychology) hmm, that did I write that? Anyway, how is your sister doing? I dont think she gives those strangely long hugs to anyone but me, and she laughed wen i got a boner... NERO, never call me, never ever call Me black, besides its either Mr.Black, oor black metla you rat! VALIUM? SERIOUSLY? Ill get that test extended you know... Because POISONING!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops