what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

What's up? Your time.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

One spooky halloween night, three lonely outcasts walk down a dark street, no longer begging for candy. A cold wind blows through the night air and something rustles in a nearby bush one kid walks over to the bush and picks up his dog "OH THERE YOU ARE, BUDDY!"

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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