- Anti Joke

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

how do you make a baby stop crying? but hot coals down its throat

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? I didn't do it right.

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

what are you mike bibby?

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

why was six afraid of seven? because seven had a huge ass mole

Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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