What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

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How do you make a black person mad? Set his house on fire.

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

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a boy named justin littleton made his own anti-joke......

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

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whats nun plus nun two nuns haha!! from jarod :}

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How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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