Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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Lets Go Lakers!

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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Why was the mime crying? Her husband died.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

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Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

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What do you call a black airline pilot? An airline pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops