Care to fill in some of the etc etc`s for me? Its not like we are complete strangers one to another either, you and I I mean, I feel pretty secure around you.

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

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What's worse than reading the same joke multiple times? Having cancer.

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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WILLYS

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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