What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

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You wanna hear a touching story? Once a pon a time you died. The end. (all anti jokes posted by me will be adressed with -blarg)

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

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Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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What's red and funny? The holocaust

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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*insert corny "a man walks into a bar" joke here*

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What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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why did the white man walking down the street have no hair? he had had cancer for 5 years prior.

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ok there is 3 people and the white kid says "bet i got a better dick than all of you" he pulls it out and then the mexican says "nope got you beat" and then the black guy says "nope got all you beat look" and then the mexican and white guys say "its because your black" so the black guy goes home and tells his mom wht happen and ask " is it true mines bigger because im black?" she said " no it bc your 23"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

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Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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