- Anti Joke

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

Its behind you like if you looked behind

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

Does 2 + 2 = fish? No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

my computer teacher just left the room. teehee JLR

What is a jew in space? Dead

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.