Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

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Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped six's mother

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Knock knock Who's there Never mind

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

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What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops