person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

Pickles are powerful

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

What did the boy skip rocks with? -A rock

It was a beautiful day. Face.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

Yo mom as so dumb.... That she has a low IQ

What's better than doing the Hannah Montana's hoedown-throwdown? Throwin' that ho down.

Why did Colussi miss school for 2 years? -Because he died

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

Whats worse than seeing a child with autism? Seeing a child doin' serious damage in a mosh pit

Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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