Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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Q: Why Marc can't run? A: Marc is a leaf.

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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You idiot thats 9 letters

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Why was the man sad? His wife left

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops